Evil Geniuses in a Nutshell

So many things for me to talk about, I'm just not going to give this a decent title.

There is a new poem on my deivantART account thingy.

I've come to a conclusion about Vicki. I let myself be walked on. I let her manipulate me and control me so that she got what she wanted... she always left me hanging because she thought I would always come back then if she needed something more. But most of the time, she is cold to me... distant. And I can't explain that except through that she was manipulating me. In the past, I have blinded myself because I retained hope that I was wrong... but I knew it. Something inside wasn't right, it didn't have the mutual feelings that other relationships have. I have no doubt that somewhere inside her, she cares for me - I have seen evidence for that. But whatever she feels, it is overpowered by other feelings and thoughts - thoughts of getting what she wants and such. That kind of a thing is at an end. It has taken me a long time... too long... to come to this conclusion, but having come to it, it must be said and I must make my choice.

I really don't know what else to say about the rest of this. There are so many thoughts inside me that want out, so many opposing view points. It seems the rollercoaster ride that was my emotions so long ago has been started again after 8 months of being dormant. What caused this... I can't say for sure... so many things remained unresolved with many open wounds still bleeding.
I'm going to leave you to your thoughts now and retreat into mine. Writing has done nothing for me... hopefully one of my friends can because I feel like I am sinking again.

- Dep