Sunday, November 21, 2004
A friend of mine
I want to take a moment (a rather long moment) to talk about a person who is arguably one of the more important people in my life and whom I don't get to talk to very often as of late and so I'd like to take this moment to thank her and just to talk a little bit about her.
Daren and I met, as most of you know, at Philemon in grade 10 (fall of '02). Not knowing many people we became friends in history, french, math and compsci class, as we shared common views on a lot of the world. Daren's never had a very stable net nickname, so we just call him Dragon. He's been other things in the past, DDM being the most famous. But Dragon he is now and will remain so. When we met, I was a very down person. I didn't have many friends (my best was Steve and we all know how great friends him and I are *sarcasm*) and generally led a very lonely life. I was also completely obsessed over a girl called Bryna, which I think I've written about before. I'd just started seriously writing poetry, even though it was crap, but I had a few supporters who were impressed with, as they called it, the depth of feeling behind what I wrote. I'd also just met Vicki again, after not talking to her for three years... christ it was a crazy time in my life. One day though, Daren finally introduced me to his girlfriend, who's net-name was Freya. Daren wouldn't tell me her real name (the evil evil person) so I called her Freya for the longest time until I finally learned her name was Nicky. Nicky I suppose was the first person ever to tell me I had potential and to encourage me. She helped me when I was down and she told me nice things about me that no one else, except Andarta, has told me, ever even until this day. I remember a lot of crying on her shoulder and bitching to her and complaining and going on and on about the stupidest things to her. She knows everything about me, my darkest secrets and she's helped me learn to live with the things I've done and move on to be a new person. Most importantly though, she believed in me. Having someone believe in you can do wonders. She also helped me to love myself. Before her, I saw the fact that I cared so much about some people as a weakness, it was a source of pain and therefore something I wished to be gone. I thought absolutely shit all of myself, and I couldn't believe anyone could even want to talk to me. I'm sure a lot of you have been where I've been and know exactly what I'm talking about. But just having Nicky there, believing in me and telling me that I can do it and yes I'm worth something and anyone who doesn't think I'm worth anything is a moron really helped. She's been the biggest influence in my life and, thanks to her, I'm mostly a happy, social person today. Sure I have down moods and I can be paranoid but compared to how I was two years ago, it is a vast improvement. And most of it is thanks to Freya. Needless to say she's a very important person to me, one of my closest and dear friends and I am very very thankful that I've met her because I'd hate to imagine where I'd be today if I hadn't.
*shocked* it really has been two years since all of this happened. High school just flew by. I'll get to that later.
I remember when her and Angelis got together again, last September (03). She waited seven years for him, oh she dated on and off but nothing as serious as she was about him. Grade school sweethearts you might say. And she was so happy when they started dating, it was just awesome. She was so happy and... it was just awesome. I started my journal a few weeks afterwards, to replace my website which was fucked up.
But the best thing she's ever done for me... well let me tell you the story.
May, 2004.
One of the worst and best months of my life. The beginning of the month: I'd been rejected by Vicki and was taking it really hard, I was latching on to every woman in sight and then Daren gave me a royal bitch slapping and shook some sense into me. I saw that I was just desperately grasping onto straws and vowed to stop. The upside to the month is that it was Nicky's birthday, she was having a party in Timmins and I'd talked my parents into driving me up there for the party and then to the science centre the next day. At the party, I met a beautiful girl, not much older than I was who was intelligent (she was going to university), loved most of the songs I did (our favorite memory from that night: singing American Pie together), and she liked my poetry. But not only that, things for us just seemed to click together and we soon found ourselves holding hands and then making out before I had to leave. But before I left, I had the prescence of mind to obtain her e-mail address. Her name was of course, Courtney, whose net name is Andarta which has now been shortned to Andy. Most of you today know where our relationship has gone and where I hope it will go. If you don't, grow some eyes or get your fingers out of your ears. But I learned a few days after getting back that Freya had purposefully introduced us at that party in hopes that we would get together and that she did this because she believed we'd be a good couple. Turns out she was right and she's introduced me to the most wonderful person in my life and for this I must thank her a billion times and it's still not enough. THANK YOU FREYA! WE LOVE YOU!
Freya and Angelis's one year anniversary was this September. He gave her, at around that time (don't remember exactly when, though it's in her journal) a promise ring. She called me almost immediately, all hyper and excited and wanted me to tell everyone. I posted about it here, all hyper as well.
I suppose I wanted to say the following then.
Freya, I want to thank you for all that you've done for me. You've made my life a very happy one, both in helping me love myself and in introducing me to Andy. I consider you one of my best friends and I always want you to be in my life some way. The last six months have been hard without being able to talk to you often, but I've managed. I miss you and I know Raven does as well. *hugs* we love you Freya. Always remember that and that we'll be here for you if you ever need us.
I know Andy was saying the same thing yesterday about you, how much of a change she's noticed thanks to you Freya. And I know we both miss you and wish you could spend a lot more time on-line.
To Freya. May you live a long productive life.
Into other news.
Andy and I are now looking at three options for next year. The first is the already overly discussed option of me going to U of Waterloo. The second is her coming to U of Ottawa and I'll do my DEC then attend U of Ottawa. The third is her coming to U of Ottawa for a year while I finish my DEC and then she goes back to U of Guelph and I go to U of Waterloo. Of these options, I think I like the third one the best, but honestly she should pick whichever makes her happier and we can go with that. I don't mind not doing my DEC, it just might help things along in the future.
There are less than six days until my birthday party and until I get to meet Andy again. I can't wait, I'm so excited and hyper, especially here at home on the weekends with not much to do sometimes. At school during the week, the days can just fly by.
With recent events what they are, I am most definately planning a trip to Timmins this winter. My parents have offered to pay for a trip to Timmins or Guelph and I think that this one would be very appreciated by Freya, who has not talked to me much since May, as she's been without internet for the most part not to mention really busy with school. The details are still up in the air, but it looks like the trip will be sometime after Christmas but before I have to go back to school on January 17th.
For those of you interested in buying me birthday presents, I have created a Christmas/Birthday Wish List. If you're stuck on what to get me, this list is stuff I'd love to get.
A friend of mine at Heritage is pregnant, with the baby expected in late March, early April. Originally he or she was expected in May, but that was before the ultrasound. Good thing too... there are way too many birthdays in may already. (Andy's, Freya's, Scorpie's and someone elses whose I keep forgetting, but it's like the 1st of May). Her and her boyfriend aren't getting married for tuition reasons, so the baby will be a bastard but *shrugs* doesn't bother me any.
That's about all the important news I can think of to report. Farethee well all
*hugs to Andy*
Daren and I met, as most of you know, at Philemon in grade 10 (fall of '02). Not knowing many people we became friends in history, french, math and compsci class, as we shared common views on a lot of the world. Daren's never had a very stable net nickname, so we just call him Dragon. He's been other things in the past, DDM being the most famous. But Dragon he is now and will remain so. When we met, I was a very down person. I didn't have many friends (my best was Steve and we all know how great friends him and I are *sarcasm*) and generally led a very lonely life. I was also completely obsessed over a girl called Bryna, which I think I've written about before. I'd just started seriously writing poetry, even though it was crap, but I had a few supporters who were impressed with, as they called it, the depth of feeling behind what I wrote. I'd also just met Vicki again, after not talking to her for three years... christ it was a crazy time in my life. One day though, Daren finally introduced me to his girlfriend, who's net-name was Freya. Daren wouldn't tell me her real name (the evil evil person) so I called her Freya for the longest time until I finally learned her name was Nicky. Nicky I suppose was the first person ever to tell me I had potential and to encourage me. She helped me when I was down and she told me nice things about me that no one else, except Andarta, has told me, ever even until this day. I remember a lot of crying on her shoulder and bitching to her and complaining and going on and on about the stupidest things to her. She knows everything about me, my darkest secrets and she's helped me learn to live with the things I've done and move on to be a new person. Most importantly though, she believed in me. Having someone believe in you can do wonders. She also helped me to love myself. Before her, I saw the fact that I cared so much about some people as a weakness, it was a source of pain and therefore something I wished to be gone. I thought absolutely shit all of myself, and I couldn't believe anyone could even want to talk to me. I'm sure a lot of you have been where I've been and know exactly what I'm talking about. But just having Nicky there, believing in me and telling me that I can do it and yes I'm worth something and anyone who doesn't think I'm worth anything is a moron really helped. She's been the biggest influence in my life and, thanks to her, I'm mostly a happy, social person today. Sure I have down moods and I can be paranoid but compared to how I was two years ago, it is a vast improvement. And most of it is thanks to Freya. Needless to say she's a very important person to me, one of my closest and dear friends and I am very very thankful that I've met her because I'd hate to imagine where I'd be today if I hadn't.
*shocked* it really has been two years since all of this happened. High school just flew by. I'll get to that later.
I remember when her and Angelis got together again, last September (03). She waited seven years for him, oh she dated on and off but nothing as serious as she was about him. Grade school sweethearts you might say. And she was so happy when they started dating, it was just awesome. She was so happy and... it was just awesome. I started my journal a few weeks afterwards, to replace my website which was fucked up.
But the best thing she's ever done for me... well let me tell you the story.
May, 2004.
One of the worst and best months of my life. The beginning of the month: I'd been rejected by Vicki and was taking it really hard, I was latching on to every woman in sight and then Daren gave me a royal bitch slapping and shook some sense into me. I saw that I was just desperately grasping onto straws and vowed to stop. The upside to the month is that it was Nicky's birthday, she was having a party in Timmins and I'd talked my parents into driving me up there for the party and then to the science centre the next day. At the party, I met a beautiful girl, not much older than I was who was intelligent (she was going to university), loved most of the songs I did (our favorite memory from that night: singing American Pie together), and she liked my poetry. But not only that, things for us just seemed to click together and we soon found ourselves holding hands and then making out before I had to leave. But before I left, I had the prescence of mind to obtain her e-mail address. Her name was of course, Courtney, whose net name is Andarta which has now been shortned to Andy. Most of you today know where our relationship has gone and where I hope it will go. If you don't, grow some eyes or get your fingers out of your ears. But I learned a few days after getting back that Freya had purposefully introduced us at that party in hopes that we would get together and that she did this because she believed we'd be a good couple. Turns out she was right and she's introduced me to the most wonderful person in my life and for this I must thank her a billion times and it's still not enough. THANK YOU FREYA! WE LOVE YOU!
Freya and Angelis's one year anniversary was this September. He gave her, at around that time (don't remember exactly when, though it's in her journal) a promise ring. She called me almost immediately, all hyper and excited and wanted me to tell everyone. I posted about it here, all hyper as well.
I suppose I wanted to say the following then.
Freya, I want to thank you for all that you've done for me. You've made my life a very happy one, both in helping me love myself and in introducing me to Andy. I consider you one of my best friends and I always want you to be in my life some way. The last six months have been hard without being able to talk to you often, but I've managed. I miss you and I know Raven does as well. *hugs* we love you Freya. Always remember that and that we'll be here for you if you ever need us.
I know Andy was saying the same thing yesterday about you, how much of a change she's noticed thanks to you Freya. And I know we both miss you and wish you could spend a lot more time on-line.
To Freya. May you live a long productive life.
Into other news.
Andy and I are now looking at three options for next year. The first is the already overly discussed option of me going to U of Waterloo. The second is her coming to U of Ottawa and I'll do my DEC then attend U of Ottawa. The third is her coming to U of Ottawa for a year while I finish my DEC and then she goes back to U of Guelph and I go to U of Waterloo. Of these options, I think I like the third one the best, but honestly she should pick whichever makes her happier and we can go with that. I don't mind not doing my DEC, it just might help things along in the future.
There are less than six days until my birthday party and until I get to meet Andy again. I can't wait, I'm so excited and hyper, especially here at home on the weekends with not much to do sometimes. At school during the week, the days can just fly by.
With recent events what they are, I am most definately planning a trip to Timmins this winter. My parents have offered to pay for a trip to Timmins or Guelph and I think that this one would be very appreciated by Freya, who has not talked to me much since May, as she's been without internet for the most part not to mention really busy with school. The details are still up in the air, but it looks like the trip will be sometime after Christmas but before I have to go back to school on January 17th.
For those of you interested in buying me birthday presents, I have created a Christmas/Birthday Wish List. If you're stuck on what to get me, this list is stuff I'd love to get.
A friend of mine at Heritage is pregnant, with the baby expected in late March, early April. Originally he or she was expected in May, but that was before the ultrasound. Good thing too... there are way too many birthdays in may already. (Andy's, Freya's, Scorpie's and someone elses whose I keep forgetting, but it's like the 1st of May). Her and her boyfriend aren't getting married for tuition reasons, so the baby will be a bastard but *shrugs* doesn't bother me any.
That's about all the important news I can think of to report. Farethee well all
*hugs to Andy*
// posted by Dep @ 10:36:00 p.m.
