Saturday, January 10, 2004
fowards
this is the hardest decision i've had to make in my life.
but... it is made.
Love isn't about the moments... its about being with a person a lot of the time. And if I can only stand her some of the time, then... would I be happy with her?
Probably not.
Could I change her? Maybe... but I am tired. Tired of life and struggles and crisises. I just want a stable relationship right now... so I am taking the cowards way out.
While she will always be in my heart, I must move on from vicki to somebody else.
She will find out tomorrow night. Her reaction may change things, but I really doubt I am going to get that reaction. I am expecting joy or neutral. If she's really sad and asks if there's anything she can do to change it...
I will have my proof.
And if she asks that, then I will probably go out with her again. But...
I doubt I'll get it.
On other matters... scorpi... well...
I'll talk about her tomorrow after bowling more but here's a brief bit.
She's like me. A lot like me... not exactly, there are differences, but her mindset is similar to my own. She's beautiful and she's intelligent.
And... I think I'm in love.
Too soon to tell.
But... I think I am.
Where it will go, I don't know. She's currently in love with a friend of mine who is not in love with her. (God do I know that feeling.)
*shrugs*
Que sera sera
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours to see
she knows... well she knows somethings.
She doesn't know a lot of what i feel for her... love yes but she doesn't know some stuff about me, like what I liek to do with my girlfriends (no you sick perv, not that :P)
hey... we'll see where it goes.
(i hope it goes somewhere... i mean that.)
ahh.. i haven't mentioned scrabble. she's got a great boyfriend now and shes got a sexy prom dress picked out.
good for her.
remnids me, i have to find something to wear for prom, but that can wait.
i may be going out for a movie later today with scorpi. she's supposed to call sometime soon.
many things are changing now.... so i guess i'll ttyl.
and wish me luck.
but... it is made.
Love isn't about the moments... its about being with a person a lot of the time. And if I can only stand her some of the time, then... would I be happy with her?
Probably not.
Could I change her? Maybe... but I am tired. Tired of life and struggles and crisises. I just want a stable relationship right now... so I am taking the cowards way out.
While she will always be in my heart, I must move on from vicki to somebody else.
She will find out tomorrow night. Her reaction may change things, but I really doubt I am going to get that reaction. I am expecting joy or neutral. If she's really sad and asks if there's anything she can do to change it...
I will have my proof.
And if she asks that, then I will probably go out with her again. But...
I doubt I'll get it.
On other matters... scorpi... well...
I'll talk about her tomorrow after bowling more but here's a brief bit.
She's like me. A lot like me... not exactly, there are differences, but her mindset is similar to my own. She's beautiful and she's intelligent.
And... I think I'm in love.
Too soon to tell.
But... I think I am.
Where it will go, I don't know. She's currently in love with a friend of mine who is not in love with her. (God do I know that feeling.)
*shrugs*
Que sera sera
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours to see
she knows... well she knows somethings.
She doesn't know a lot of what i feel for her... love yes but she doesn't know some stuff about me, like what I liek to do with my girlfriends (no you sick perv, not that :P)
hey... we'll see where it goes.
(i hope it goes somewhere... i mean that.)
ahh.. i haven't mentioned scrabble. she's got a great boyfriend now and shes got a sexy prom dress picked out.
good for her.
remnids me, i have to find something to wear for prom, but that can wait.
i may be going out for a movie later today with scorpi. she's supposed to call sometime soon.
many things are changing now.... so i guess i'll ttyl.
and wish me luck.
// posted by Dep @ 5:51:00 p.m.
