Saturday, October 04, 2003
Chaos
Utter utter chaos... sounds like fun, no?
Anyways...
Today I had a sudden urge to go to a park and eat baguettes. For those of you who live where I live, its the Aydelu park... if you dont know where that is, then oh well. Its a park, with a baseball field, and late at night, its so quiet and peaceful.
Almost like going camping...
anyways
I really should start working on my story. I have a pile of improvements in mind...
One... Start part III from the beginning
Two... add a new part, describing Freyas relationship with Mike from the beginning of the story.
So, in esscense, develop the characters of Freya and Julianna more, by showing their reactions to what Mike tells them. Those are what I'm sure of doing
Three... Change the scene describing mike and juliannas "relationship" (if you can call it that) to something more... well less... dirty. I think that part came off wrong.
Four... more character feelings at the end of Bridgets part (ie at her death) for mike and for her, draw the part out more, add detail.
Five... lengthen the interlude in between 2003 and 2006 (in all 4 parts)
Six... describe the after effects of Bridgets death on mike in more detail (before he meets julianna.)
Basically these improve the details which are presented, to give a deeper view of the characters feelings/emotions/actions/reasons behind their actions
And of course, a lot of word/sentance structure changes, trying to be more accurate with words. The way I do this is by letting it sit for a week, forgetting about it. Then come back and read and try to think about how im describing the event, not how it actually happened (since of course, half of the events in the story come true.) and then compare what the story gives me to what I remember, and add detail based on that. (Or subtract inaccuracies that I didn't intentionally leave in.)
The only character, btw, whos actions;/feelings/thoughts I'm 100% sure on are mikes (since he is, of course, based on me.) The rest... who knows. Its mostly fiction on Bridgets part, though its how i'd like to picture the character shes based on. Freya... well most of that is how I picture her also (or wil lbe once I write it) and julianna is mostly made up also.
Freya's "boyfriend" in the book (who is NOT based on her current boyfriend) isnt based on anyone in particular now... but i'm thinking about developing his character more, mostly through freyas eyes in the story. And I have the perfect asshole to base it on...
Anyways... we'll see how it all turns out. This is just an outline really, with two peoples points of views completed, which tell one story. I'm thinking about adding another... though I'm not sure. If I don't like it, I'll scrap that part of it.
And some people (on line) are asking what my meaning is... well here it is
Life is chaos. For example, Mike gets what hes always wanted (Bridget) and then loses her through a stupid stupid misunderstanding. It's no ones fault really, but they should have talked about it. Freya sees it as her fault (and Mike also does, thats one of the revisions im making) and she is unable to live with what she has done to her love. Because, really, Freya loves Mike, as Mike loves Freya... in an intimate friends sortof way thats difficult to explain. So... she takes her own life, hoping to find forgiveness. And then... Julianna, whos also in love with Mike (man this guy has lots of people in love with him) trys to comfort her... but her experiances with past boyfriends has led her to believe that ALL men want comfort in the form of sex... so she gives him that. And mike goes along with it... until he sees what he has become. He sees that he is using her body just to give himself comfort... and runs away. He hates the kind of person he has become. So he kills himself, without takling to julianna about what her real feeligns are. oops. Julianna, who it turns out, is in love with him, runs away from all the memories of the three that are left behind... and in the end, kills herself, because she has known true love and probably never will again. So... thats the whole plot. The meaning is basically... well...
When I wrote it I wanted to show someone (the person who Bridget is based on) how much I love her. The rest is all icing at that moment. Then, other people read it and saw hidden messages in it that I myself did not see at first...
The first, which I put in there myself, is how teenagers (because everyone in this story is between the ages of 15 and 19) can feel love, and can express it. It frustrates me sometimes to hear, or read of adults saying "you're only 16... you dont know what love is. That pisses me off and I wanted to show teens which can know what love is.
The second, which I did not, but later found common to all the subplots, is that misunderstandings are the cause of a lot of problems. Look at Bridget and Mike. Huge misunderstandings, each of them thinking the other will see them as weak if they say that they love the other, and then, in the end, with freya in the hospital and all. And then, between Freya and Mike, with her thinking its her fault... thats a misunderstanding. And freyas bf leaving her because he thinks shes mad at him... thats a misunderstanding. And Mike thinking julianna doesnt love him and just wants sex... thats a misunderstanding. Its all misunderstandings that cause the majority of the problems in the lives of my characters (And in my life, come to think of it)
there are a few more in there, but those are the ones i think its important to find and understand.
Anyways...
Today I had a sudden urge to go to a park and eat baguettes. For those of you who live where I live, its the Aydelu park... if you dont know where that is, then oh well. Its a park, with a baseball field, and late at night, its so quiet and peaceful.
Almost like going camping...
anyways
I really should start working on my story. I have a pile of improvements in mind...
One... Start part III from the beginning
Two... add a new part, describing Freyas relationship with Mike from the beginning of the story.
So, in esscense, develop the characters of Freya and Julianna more, by showing their reactions to what Mike tells them. Those are what I'm sure of doing
Three... Change the scene describing mike and juliannas "relationship" (if you can call it that) to something more... well less... dirty. I think that part came off wrong.
Four... more character feelings at the end of Bridgets part (ie at her death) for mike and for her, draw the part out more, add detail.
Five... lengthen the interlude in between 2003 and 2006 (in all 4 parts)
Six... describe the after effects of Bridgets death on mike in more detail (before he meets julianna.)
Basically these improve the details which are presented, to give a deeper view of the characters feelings/emotions/actions/reasons behind their actions
And of course, a lot of word/sentance structure changes, trying to be more accurate with words. The way I do this is by letting it sit for a week, forgetting about it. Then come back and read and try to think about how im describing the event, not how it actually happened (since of course, half of the events in the story come true.) and then compare what the story gives me to what I remember, and add detail based on that. (Or subtract inaccuracies that I didn't intentionally leave in.)
The only character, btw, whos actions;/feelings/thoughts I'm 100% sure on are mikes (since he is, of course, based on me.) The rest... who knows. Its mostly fiction on Bridgets part, though its how i'd like to picture the character shes based on. Freya... well most of that is how I picture her also (or wil lbe once I write it) and julianna is mostly made up also.
Freya's "boyfriend" in the book (who is NOT based on her current boyfriend) isnt based on anyone in particular now... but i'm thinking about developing his character more, mostly through freyas eyes in the story. And I have the perfect asshole to base it on...
Anyways... we'll see how it all turns out. This is just an outline really, with two peoples points of views completed, which tell one story. I'm thinking about adding another... though I'm not sure. If I don't like it, I'll scrap that part of it.
And some people (on line) are asking what my meaning is... well here it is
Life is chaos. For example, Mike gets what hes always wanted (Bridget) and then loses her through a stupid stupid misunderstanding. It's no ones fault really, but they should have talked about it. Freya sees it as her fault (and Mike also does, thats one of the revisions im making) and she is unable to live with what she has done to her love. Because, really, Freya loves Mike, as Mike loves Freya... in an intimate friends sortof way thats difficult to explain. So... she takes her own life, hoping to find forgiveness. And then... Julianna, whos also in love with Mike (man this guy has lots of people in love with him) trys to comfort her... but her experiances with past boyfriends has led her to believe that ALL men want comfort in the form of sex... so she gives him that. And mike goes along with it... until he sees what he has become. He sees that he is using her body just to give himself comfort... and runs away. He hates the kind of person he has become. So he kills himself, without takling to julianna about what her real feeligns are. oops. Julianna, who it turns out, is in love with him, runs away from all the memories of the three that are left behind... and in the end, kills herself, because she has known true love and probably never will again. So... thats the whole plot. The meaning is basically... well...
When I wrote it I wanted to show someone (the person who Bridget is based on) how much I love her. The rest is all icing at that moment. Then, other people read it and saw hidden messages in it that I myself did not see at first...
The first, which I put in there myself, is how teenagers (because everyone in this story is between the ages of 15 and 19) can feel love, and can express it. It frustrates me sometimes to hear, or read of adults saying "you're only 16... you dont know what love is. That pisses me off and I wanted to show teens which can know what love is.
The second, which I did not, but later found common to all the subplots, is that misunderstandings are the cause of a lot of problems. Look at Bridget and Mike. Huge misunderstandings, each of them thinking the other will see them as weak if they say that they love the other, and then, in the end, with freya in the hospital and all. And then, between Freya and Mike, with her thinking its her fault... thats a misunderstanding. And freyas bf leaving her because he thinks shes mad at him... thats a misunderstanding. And Mike thinking julianna doesnt love him and just wants sex... thats a misunderstanding. Its all misunderstandings that cause the majority of the problems in the lives of my characters (And in my life, come to think of it)
there are a few more in there, but those are the ones i think its important to find and understand.
// posted by Dep @ 11:32:00 a.m.
