Thursday, October 16, 2003
an apology
What can I say of my life...
pure hell.
ah... a coincidence... my brother is listening to "Highway to hell"
(the irony)
Anyways... I'm sure some of you have read freyas blog... (And you know im Dep right?) so... I need to respond.
Freya... (and I am goign to be honest) more than anything in the world I want you to be happy. KoS feels the same way... dark nova, I dunno. I know he's looking into other possibilities for a girlfriend, so I think he's on the road to recovery. But I myself cannot... will not... interefere in another persons relationship. When DN and you were together, when the person whos name I shall not speak were together and when you and Angelis were/are together... I stayed away cause I knew you had feelings for someone. (Angelis.) I wish for nothing but the best for you... my own feelings dont matter. I'm used to getting stepped on through life... happened so many times I'm used to it now. Go and be happy Freya... I understand everything you've said in your blog.
Dark angel... well... I gave her the second story today (I think everyone who reads this has also read the story.) I don't know what she will think about it but... I guess I'll find out tomorrow wont I. Or on the weekend. She knows who I base my characters on... so...
It really is a true story... except for the suicides of course... and all the other death that appears in the story. Everyone there is based on a real person and it is how I see those people. Maybe I'm deluding myself in seeing Dark Angel as Bridget... but it's how I want her to be.(oh... except Frank... Frank is not based on anyone that I know of)
But the experiances in 2003... up to the end of september in the story are true. Mike's personality is based on mine... no he is me, except, honestly, i cannot kill myself. I have not the will nor the courage to face whats beyond the grave... for I fear that there is nothing.
Anyways... I have a sudden urge to cry and listen to sad music in the dark... so im gonna turn off the lights and continue rebuilding my files... later
pure hell.
ah... a coincidence... my brother is listening to "Highway to hell"
(the irony)
Anyways... I'm sure some of you have read freyas blog... (And you know im Dep right?) so... I need to respond.
Freya... (and I am goign to be honest) more than anything in the world I want you to be happy. KoS feels the same way... dark nova, I dunno. I know he's looking into other possibilities for a girlfriend, so I think he's on the road to recovery. But I myself cannot... will not... interefere in another persons relationship. When DN and you were together, when the person whos name I shall not speak were together and when you and Angelis were/are together... I stayed away cause I knew you had feelings for someone. (Angelis.) I wish for nothing but the best for you... my own feelings dont matter. I'm used to getting stepped on through life... happened so many times I'm used to it now. Go and be happy Freya... I understand everything you've said in your blog.
Dark angel... well... I gave her the second story today (I think everyone who reads this has also read the story.) I don't know what she will think about it but... I guess I'll find out tomorrow wont I. Or on the weekend. She knows who I base my characters on... so...
It really is a true story... except for the suicides of course... and all the other death that appears in the story. Everyone there is based on a real person and it is how I see those people. Maybe I'm deluding myself in seeing Dark Angel as Bridget... but it's how I want her to be.(oh... except Frank... Frank is not based on anyone that I know of)
But the experiances in 2003... up to the end of september in the story are true. Mike's personality is based on mine... no he is me, except, honestly, i cannot kill myself. I have not the will nor the courage to face whats beyond the grave... for I fear that there is nothing.
Anyways... I have a sudden urge to cry and listen to sad music in the dark... so im gonna turn off the lights and continue rebuilding my files... later
// posted by Dep @ 5:02:00 p.m.
