Evil Geniuses in a Nutshell

Last night... or I should say, this morning... I didn't get to sleep until about 2AM... I had too much going on in my head...

I'm worried about my angel... I'm worried that she secretly hates me... and I don't know if I'm right... if i'm taking a small incident and blowing it out of proportion... or if I'm just being paranoid...

Life, up to this point in time, has held much rejection for me by women. It was at the point I didn't think any woman could accept me... ty freya for changing me. But... the fear is still there... that she'll take my love and use it as a dagger to pierce me. Paranoia? perhaps. But paranoia or not, my fear is real.

Why do some people give such confusing, mind-bending, conflicting statements sometimes?? I don't know... all I know is that I love her... and I think and hope she loves me...

I'm questioning if life mocks me... to have given me what I've always wanted (her) yet with a twist... why can't I haev a sure thing for once in my life... always getting shafted, thats me...

I'm going to tell her that I love her... and we're going to talka bout somethings... my reason behind this came to me last night... if she responds positively then i've gained... if she responds negatively... (ie gets pissed at me, or mocks me for having such feelings...) then i'll know shes not the one... because I know that my one will never mock me for loving her so deeply it hurts...

Later all